Young Carers

How I Want To Be Supported: Tips for Workers from Young Carers

The Youth Coalition and the Children of Parents with a Mental Illness Project developed this fact sheet from consultations with young people who have a parent with a mental illness or comorbidity.They were asked what messages they would like workers and other health professionals to be made aware of. The Youth Coalition collated a range of their responses into the following key messages.

Support me and my family

Young people want support to be available for both them and the members of their family.

“Have a family and an individual focus.”

We feel alone sometimes

When a parent has a mental illness or comorbidity, each member of the family can feel isolated. It is important to help connect each member of the family with appropriate support and to the community.

“The worst thing you can do to someone with a mental illness or drug problem is to make them feel different and left out.”

My parent’s illness affects me

Young people talked about how their parent’s mental illness or dual diagnosis affected them and the other members of the family. It can affect all aspects of life.

“[Looking at] my [school] marks you can tell where my mum wasn’t well. You can map it.”

Build skills and supports in the family

Young people called on workers to support building skills and supports systems within the family.

“Support the parent’s to support their kids.”

Help me find out what’s out there

Young people wanted support to find out what programs, services and supports are available in the community for them and their family. It is important for workers to keep up to date with supports and resources so that they can link up young people and their families.

“There needs to be a larger awareness of what services are out there.”

If I’m wary of you it may be because I’ve had my trust broken before

Young people discussed how they’d had their trust broken by adults in a range of positions of power and responsibility. These experiences sometimes had a profound and long-term impact on young people’s willingness to seek external support and information.

“This worker said, “Yeah, you can trust me”, and then I found out that they had told other people, and then it went around that everyone knew that I had a schizo mum. Then I was called schizo cause my mum was schizophrenic. They convinced me I could trust them. It screwed up everything for me.”

It’s hard seeing my parent like that

Young people talked about how difficult it was to see their parent unwell.  They talked about how frightening these experiences were and how important it was for them to be informed and supported.

“It’s pretty scary when you see your mum connected to machines, I was 14. You see that in movies and that is when people die. I didn’t know what was happening. I was shocked and all sad.”

Be flexible

Young people called on workers to be flexible and youth friendly in the way they work.  They said they were more likely to engage and seek support if this happened.

“They’ll arrange a meeting with you and if you’re not comfortable they will go somewhere else.”

Stigma hurts

Young people had many experiences to share about the negative impact of stigma on themselves, their parent and their family. They thought it was important for workers to challenge stereotypes and stigma.

“You get excluded because [the parents] have something wrong with them.”

Take time to help me find practical solutions

Young people called on workers to work with them to identify practical and realistic solutions. They considered each family to be unique in their needs and solutions.

“I’d rather talk to someone face to face that can give me advice about my mum. You know, next time she does this, do that…”

It takes time

Most of the young people couldn’t remember a time when their parents weren’t unwell. It’s important to recognise that this is a long-term issue potentially requiring long-term support.

“It took 6 years for my mum to be diagnosed with bipolar, 9 trips to the hospital and many pills later…”

Help me understand what is happening

Young people called on workers to support them to understand what was happening to their parent, to their family and to them. “The worst is when you don’t know what’s going on or why a worker is doing something.”

[1] Debbie Noble-Carr (2001) Young Carers Research Project, Carers Australia.

[2] Youth Coalition of the ACT (2008) Young Carers Research.

[3] CYCLOPS_ACT (2002) Young Carers: The Facts, Anglicare Canberra and Goulburn, http://www.cyclopsact.org/downloads/facts.pdf, as at 15 March, 2010.

[4] Tim Moore (2001) Barriers to Access for Young Carers to Mainstream Services, CYCLOPS_ACT, Anglicare Canberra and Goulburn.